2 redboxes... 2 were out of order. I was going to rent whatever movie I wanted while my wife was in the car. But since we rented a movie "on demand" Megan got her say and we are now watching "No Strings Attached." I don't think I am reaching when I say that "on demand" doesn't apply to this movie any more than it applies to my first job as a submarine sandwich artist at a popular Northeastern food chain. As it turns out, while I want to see a documentary on Bill Hicks - my wife wants to see Ashton Kutcher's ass cheeks and horrible acting. I have been looking for an opportunity to update this thing anyway.
As I type this I have a decision to make. Am i going to knock your socks off with a political deposition on how the ACLU is not actually protecting your civil liberties, nor are your civil liberties as you probably see them even remotely good for your/society's well being? I could. And I will, but not tonight. Not after 3 Sierra Nevada Pale Ales, a Miller Lite and a Shiner Bock at South Street.
No tonight I feel justified. I have recently discovered that there are others out there like me - that think of the same things I think about. Filmdrunk.com's blogger has asked his readers to submit personal Glenn Danzig stories... and they have responded. People have written into his blog with their real life encounters with Glenn Danzig - and they blow my mind.
Now you may be saying to yourself, "Dean, what do you want with stories about devil worshiping punk/metal rock star and why do you care how he interacts with his fans?" The answer is simple - I have no idea. I don't really have an opinion on The Misfits and Danzig is an outlet for angry trench-coat wearing kids. At the same tiime, I'm a christian that will be at church tomorrow morning and believes Glenn Danzig - at least at this point - will spend eternity in a very real Hell. However, I do know WHEN my interest in creepers acting normal started. It started several years ago when I was watching a TV show that I wouldn't admit to watching and learned that Marilyn Manson was dating... someone. That's when I realized that people that are famous for stirring the pot, shocking people with their disregard for social norms and general anti-social behavior, have a normal side to their life.
I started to wonder what these people were like in everyday settings. I mean really - Marilyn Manson doesn't wear make up all of the time. He woke up in the morning and probably had to eat something (I can only hope Fruit Loops) for breakfast. And where is the "on" swtich. Did he walk out of his front door picking his nose only to realize someone is looking at him and immediately break into a power strut and Jesus-hating scowl? People have interactions with Glenn Danzig outside of his performances. He goes to the grocery store and buys his favorite brand of soft drink and checks the date on the milk. And then later that night he adorns his eyeliner and screams about Satan and "thinking for yourself." He shops for clothes. Did your head just explode? He probably literally goes into a strip mall and heads straight for the black shirts.
I don't know why, but as a self proclaimed expert on human behavior (shut up - I am) I can't help but wonder when Anton Levay was vulnerable. When he discovered he was out of creamer after he made a pot of coffee, did he think to himself, "what would my followers think? My minions! They can't hear of this!" I bet being an evil free thinker is exhausting. I'm glad I don't have that pressure. I would suck at it. Some photographer would catch me holding a chocolate milk, renting a Pixar movie at a redbox and it would be curtains for my reputation.
I can't really figure out how to end this post. I think that is about it, but I also feel like no one will understand what I mean. Think about it this way: Trent Reznor has, at some point in his life had explosive diarrhea. The guy responsible for "Pretty Hate Machine" was at the complete mercy of his bowels. "Head Like A Hole" is still a pretty solid song, but you have to find humor in the fact that no matter how seriously you take yourself - you will at some point puke. And that makes you weak and gross and vulnerable.
I guess the strangest part of all of this is watching people buy into personas. I mean - how can anyone justify idolizing a musician, actor or blogger (hint, hint) when said person would be accutely aware of all of his/her idol's wierdness/grossness within just one day as a fly on the wall of their life. It's equivalent to hearing a vice president talk when he doesn't know his microphone is on. He could have graduated from an Ivy League school, but in that moment - he is uneducated redneck.
Hopefully this doesn't read like nonsense. It may, but it's better than anything you have thought of today. Unless you happen to look at my facebook photos and wonder how I got so handsome. In that case - you shouldn't be wasting your time reading this. Get back over to those photos and admire my sexxxy dimples. Sweet dreams, cupcake. AAAAAHHHHH! (Note: I really didn't know how to end this post)
